V is for Vocabulary

We have already alluded to several words that trigger dismay in the hearts of triad members. Today, we’re going to share with you some replacement vocabulary to help guide you in your conversations about adoption.

🚫Real parent ✅Birth Parent
🚫Natural parent ✅ Biological Parent
🚫Own Child ✅Birth child
🚫 Adopted/Own child ✅My child
🚫Gave up ✅Made a plan
🚫Decided to Keep ✅Decided to parent
🚫Is adopted ✅Was adopted
🚫Track down parents ✅Search
🚫Foreign adoption ✅International adoption
🚫Adoptive Parent ✅Parent

A few other things to know:

A birth parent is not a birth parent until their child is born. If a woman or family is in the process of making an adoption plan for their child, they are considered an expectant mother or family until the child is born.

While we openly talk about the cost of the process of adoption here at Dwell, and we encourage you help ease that cost through our grant program, there is never a time when the question "How much did they cost?" is appropriate.

Saying that a child who was adopted is "lucky" isn't a positive thing to say. Children who have been adopted experience deep trauma from separation, and will live with that trauma their whole lives.
Please do not speak ill of or assume the worst of our child's first family. Their stories are not ours to tell.

What are some positive adoption terms that you use?